Our Big News: Mom-Mode.

I've been hinting at some "news" for the past week that I've been eager to share with y'all. It wasn't until yesterday that we felt we were in a place that we could actually speak freely about the situation. A couple of close friends knew what was going, and of course our family, but everyone else was left in the dark. To finally spoil the surprise for you... we now have custody of Mike's 3 year old son, Toby! We are over the moon excited about it! Things started falling in place on Friday, much much sooner than we expected. We weren't expecting to bring him home with us until today, but we found ourselves in front of a judge on Friday and we were so very tickled to bring him back with us (after a few hours at Chuck E. Cheese, of course!)
Many of you were readers back when Toby would visit us every other weekend, and you may remember seeing him make some guest appearances on my blog as a wee lil' lad! I haven't written about him in a long time because things weren't going very well. We weren't able to see him for a long time and it really did break our hearts. We weren't sure we were going to ever see him again, so when we got the call saying we may be able to have him come live with us we were pretty stoked. And stressed. So many people have asked me (both politely, and not so) about Toby since his last mention on the blog, and eventually I stopped responding to anything regarding the situation. It quickly became one of my "no go topics," meaning I didn't speak of it... well... ever. We decided to keep that part of our life private. It was a painful thing to go through for both of us and we didn't need to air any dirty laundry. 

I won't go into details about how or why this situation came to be. Honestly it isn't a happy story in terms of the details. It's also not my story to tell. What I will say is that although we were caught completely off guard, no kids clothes, carseat, or bed/room for him, we are making the most of it and we're making it work!

I was able to take off of work on Friday to spend time with Mike and Toby, helping him get acquainted with our new house. The timing is quite amazing honestly. We had no idea something like this could/would happen when we decided to move and get a house, but it's almost like fate. We got the first phone call over a week and a half ago... just 2 days after we moved in. Since getting him on Friday we've bought (and built!) Toby a bed, in his very own room, and acquired lots of fun, educational toys and cute button-up shirts to match Dad's. He's 3! He's talking, trying to potty train, and he's basically a big kid now. It's incredible. 

We know we are able to provide him with a stable and caring environment, full of love and laughter. Lots of cuddles and bedtime stories, too. Trips to the zoo, museums, aquariums and the Adventure Science Center! We're going to be able to help him grow and learn, and basically mold him into a stellar member of society. Like I mentioned above, we're both elated and positively terrified... but this is our new life! I don't know the first thing about kids but step-momma mode has to kick in and make it work! We're really excited to see what the future holds for our little family!

Long gone are the solo coffee date nights Mike and I had daily, and the jetting off on random roadtrips for a week or more. Here come the sick days, naptimes, and endless changes of clothes thanks to little man's insatiable desire to wipe his mouth on his shirt sleeves. We're trading daily NCIS marathons for Power Rangers and Dora the Explorer (and currently on our tv: Toy Story 3). Kind of sounds like a fair trade to me! 

I didn't feel right not sharing this part of our lives on here simply because it is just that: our life. The biggest part of it. We're having to push some stuff around and give up a little free time and productivity, but he's our top priority. I apologize to everyone waiting to hear from me about blog designs and Honeybean designers... I promise they're coming! This sort of hit us all of a sudden and I still don't think we've quite caught up. The past 72 hours have been so totally crazy and exhausting. I guess we better get used to that!

With that being said, I'll be taking on slightly fewer design clients per month, simply so my clients are able to get the best experience and treatment possible. Every few minutes he's hungry or needs changing or wants to play with his blocks of flash cards... I can't help but step away and partake with him and Mike. I knew I really really wanted kids with Mike... and I won't lie, I've had baby fever for a while now! But the past few days have done nothing short of solidify that feeling... like we're the perfect team to raise a kid. I guess we'll hold off on baby makin' for a little bit, just to ensure Toby gets lots and lots of attention, and that we retain our sanity. But I know he'll make the very best big brother.

When sharing Toby in the past, I received a few not-so-nice comments saying things like "You'll never be his mother" and "You're not his step mom" etc. Whether Toby is my biological son or not, I will (and do) love him with every fiber of my being. I will always treat him just as if he were my own flesh and blood. Nothing will ever change that. I don't know what it's like for other people to all of a sudden come in possession of a 3 year old toddler, but I just know we're going to do the best we can. And that we're excited. That's really what he needs right now. (The best part? He's totally into us decorating his room in sharks! Thatta boy!) Whether he's with us for the next 15 years, 3 years, or 3 months... we're going to cherish every moment we have. I'm excited to share this new chapter of our lives with all of y'all. Thanks for sticking around <3

216 comments:

  1. he looks like such a sweetheart! you are going to be such a wonderful mother, as i am sure you already are showing him so much love. i hope these next few weeks allow you to get into a good routine :)

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  2. Congratulations to the 3 of you!!!!! I love what you have written about being there for him. My stepdad treated me as his own from the first, and as a now late-twenties lady, I still adore him. I wish the three of you all the laughter, hugs and love in the world. ENJOY!

    Luvluv,
    Sway xx
    Ps - yay for the shark bedroom! Don't forget to sneak in an octopus for us octo-fans! x

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  3. I'm so happy for you and Mike. If my opinion is anything to go by, Toby is gunna have an awesome childhood. Enjoy it while you can, I'm sure he'll grow up so fast!

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  4. That is some wonderful news Kaelah. I am happy for you and Mike and little Toby of course.

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  5. wow! congratulations! that's the most exciting thing ever!!! and he is one adorable little boy, i must say!

    drop by allister bee soon!

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  6. Welcome to motherhood Kaelah! I know you and Mike are going to be great parents to Toby and I hope you enjoy your new life together reading this news has me glowing inside!

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  7. That's excellent news, I wish you all the best!

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  8. Aww he is just the cutest! Congratulations - I can tell you're super excited! X

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  9. wow girl! this is so amazing. i am so happy for you both. toby is so lucky to have you two in his life! can't wait to read more about your love, and adventures with him!
    xoxo

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  10. How exciting! Congratulations, you two! :D And Toby as well - sounds like he's gonna be in good hands :)

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  11. What a lovely story and what a gorgeous boy. I'm wishing you all the luck from the other side of the pond. Huge congratulations from England and I'm sure you are all going to be very happy. Ignore the doubters and jealous types. x

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  12. Congratulations sweetie!!! He is so handsome and I know that you will make an excellent mother!!! You have so much wisdom to share and I know that you will be the coolest mother at the PTA!! :)
    xoxo

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  13. I don't know if congrats if this right word to use, but I'm happy you and Mike are able to be a family with Toby and provide him with lots of love and sharks.

    BUT, omg, don't let him watch Toy Story 3!!! I'm 28 and I still cry when I think about it!

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  14. This makes me so happy! He is such a lucky little man! I can't wait to hear about all of your new family adventures!

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  15. Congratulations!!! How terrifying and exciting! I'm sending you so many good luck vibes. So many new beginnings for you in such a short space of time. Enjoy it, i'm sure it'll speed by
    xxx

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  16. Congrats!!! Life does change when you have kids but its so much fun!

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  17. Wow, that's big news indeed! I can't help but feel you'll be a wonderful mother/stepmother/mother-figure to him. My stepmother is one of the most precious people in my life, and I have no doubt you'll have the same amazingly positive influence on Toby's life.

    All the best in the coming weeks as you adapt to this new life.

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  18. oh kaelah, sounds so good but also a lot of work, wow. can't believe that you're now a "real mom". i wish you three all the best!!!

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  19. Oh you have no idea how eager I've been to hear your news. Lady you're gonna do amazing! I'm so excited for you guys and I've always hoped I'd get to see peeks of Toby again. I'm really so so very happy for all three of you. C:

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  20. oh my goodness i thought you were about to announce you were pregnant for some reason lol! but this is exciting news, I'm sure he will bring you both new adventures and fun experiences!

    :)
    xx

    http://daydreamfrenzy.blogspot.com/
    http://daydreamfrenzy.blogspot.com/
    http://daydreamfrenzy.blogspot.com/

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  21. Congratulations, I am so happy for you and I know that both you and Mike will do such a fantastic job at raising him, it already sounds like you are, with spending lots of time with him to make sure he is acquainted with his new home and focussing all your attention on him :). I hope that he is very happy in his new home :). With regards to the nasty comments like 'you will never be his mother' etc. I can't believe someone would say that! It is missguided to say the least. My friend looks after his child (which isn't biologically his)and treats him exactly the same as all his other biological children. His son calls him dad and they have the perfect father-son relationship. My mum is my biological mother, but I consider my aunty to be more my mum than my biological mother.

    What I'm trying to say is that whether you are related biologically doesn't matter. What's important is the relationship and love you both have for each other. That's far more important than being biologically related.

    Sorry for the huge comment. I didn't read your blog when Toby was featured, but nevertheless I am so happy for you both, and for Toby as he has some awesome parents :) xx

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  22. Congratulations!!! I guess I started reading after you stopped posting about him, because I had no idea Mike had a son. He's SO STINKIN ADORABLE! I wish all three of you the best of luck :)

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  23. Congrats! He looks very sweet, and how great to have you and Mike to take care of him (you both seem very sweet as well) I can't wait to see more of him and your adventures together as a family!

    http://www.sealedwithakay.com
    xo
    Kayla

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  24. I guess I found your blog recently enough that I didn't realize Mike had a son! My fiance (also named Mike - ha) has a 3yo as well (Ben). We have part-time custody and WOW it's been quite an experience for me becoming an instant step-mom. I'd never even babysat before!

    Toby is such a handsome young man! :)

    This is such amazing news. Obviously some higher power or fate or whatever you want to believe in knew this was the right time :) Best wishes for your family!

    - Mandi (www.lifeinbeta.com)

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  25. Ice told you before and ill tell you again, you're an incredible human being. If you raise a child, whether it be yours or your fiances or you 2nd cousins adopted friends kid, you're a mother and I know you and mike will be the best parents that you can. Love you do much and I am so very happy for you and especially for mike. And double especially for Toby.

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  26. Awww! Congrats! You two will give that boy the best there is and love him to pieces! :)

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  27. Ice told you before and ill tell you again, you're an incredible human being. If you raise a child, whether it be yours or your fiances or you 2nd cousins adopted friends kid, you're a mother and I know you and mike will be the best parents that you can. Love you do much and I am so very happy for you and especially for mike. And double especially for Toby.

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  28. Aww, I'm so happy for you guys.

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  29. Oh my goodness, this is so exciting! Congratulations! This little boy is so lucky to have so much love in his life! You can do this, girl!

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  30. I was adopted by my step-dad when I was 11 and he's been the biggest inspiration in my life. Good on you and Mike for tackling this head-on. You are obviously a strong couple and it takes a wonderful person to raise someone else's child. You'll do brilliantly. x

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  31. So amazing! You're going to make great parents- it gives me hope for the future when decent, kind, creative people raise children together. Good luck.

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  32. First, off...Congratulations! I know that there will be a bit of an adjustment period but I know that you'll be an amazing family together. And the thought of people saying horrible things to you in any form about him or your relationship to him...they're complete and utter jerks. Ignore their vileness. And yay! for having a shark buddy!

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  33. That's very exciting! I'm sure you will be a great mother to him!

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  34. Goshdarnit, I just did my make-up... this made me tear up! I know a thing or two about the field of child custody... and you and Mike are such generous and kind people to go through all this trouble <3 I am sure that it is worth it, but not all people think like that! Don't let other people tell you stuff about 'never being his mom', bullshit, you and Mike will be amazing parents! Good luck! and Toby looks adorable! Such a cutie-pie!

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  35. Congratulations!! How sweet.
    http://mereandthemr.blogspot.com/

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  36. Wow, that's amazing! You're both gonna be amazing parents and I'm so excited to hear of all your new stories with the little man now in your life.

    xo,
    Em

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  37. That is absolutely amazing news - congratulations, and I'm sure you'll all be very happy together. xxxxxx

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  38. He is adorable! You guys are going to be great. He is one lucky boy to have all your love in his life. What an adventure for you little family :)

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  39. I know lots of people your age, and none of them would be responsible, caring, selfless or loving enough to take on a step child, especially on top of running their own business too. Well done you - you are a wonderful wonderful person and he is so lucky to have you both! I have a 3 year old and he is the most fun ever, so bring on the joy!

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  40. Congrats, lady! No need to listen to the haters who will say negative things for the sake of just being negative. You're helping a sweet boy and giving him the love and care he deservers.

    Good luck to you and Mike while you transition into this phase of your life and I know you guys will do swell!!

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  41. Congratulations!!! He looks like a heartbreaker already. Will you post pictures of his Shark Room when its done? I am sure it will look steller. He's one lucky kid to be with the both of you and have all that love and attention. good Luck in the future.

    Paula Vaughan
    http://paula-vaughan.blogspot.com/

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    1. You betcha! We'll definitely share pictures!

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  42. What lovely news, I am so happy for all 3 of you! XO

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  43. That's so exciting, Kaelah! I'm so happy for you, Mike, and Toby - it does sound like you three are going to be an amazing family. After seeing Toby pictures on your Twitter/Instagram this weekend, I'm especially excited to see more of this little dude. He's adorable! You're going to make a great mom.

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  44. Omgsh! I'm so happy for you two! Toby is adorable and I can't even imagine how happy Mike must be. I know this will be great for Toby and that you'll be an amazing step-mom. <3

    And as for the house situation - wow! The timing of your move was so perfect! I think it's so fun when God does stuff like that. :D

    Congrats again! I hope we'll be seeing Toby around the blog more often now. ;)

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  45. Oh my goodness, Toby is such a darling and I know you and Mike will make his life so exciting and special. So happy for you! It has to be overwhelming too, but I believe in you both!

    xx, C

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  46. He is incredibly adorable! I wish you all the best!

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  47. He is so adorable! I wish you all the best!

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  48. Kaelah! Congratulations! I can tell you have the vertigo that comes with the excitement of new things in life. That's what I call a life! I am happy for you.

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  49. He's so so adorable! Congrats you two! You are going to have SO much fun!

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  50. Kaelah, I am so happy for you and Mike! Toby is lucky to have such an awesome step-mom like you to take the reigns, and I know you'll do an amazing job. xoxo

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  51. That's wonderful. Being a parent is the most life-changing and rewarding experience. Enjoy every minute as it flies by!!

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  52. The role of a stepmom is super tricky on both sides of the equation, but by the sounds of it you're going to be just wonderful and I'm SO happy for you :) You seem so dedicated to making life for this little boy as best as can be and that's truly heart warming. HATERS GONNA HATE, mothers gonna mother ;)

    Congratulations you two(three?) :) Best wishes for your little family!
    xo
    http://kittysnooks.blogspot.com/

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  53. What a sweetie :) Wish you all the best on this new adventure!!

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  54. Hey Kaelah!

    I don't comment here too often, but I just wanted to tell you how happy I am for you! I'm a new stepmom myself and it comes with a lot of challenges. I'm sure you two will do a fantastic job with raising him into a sweet young man. He already looks like a sweetie!

    I can't believe anyone would say mean comments like that. He doesn't have to be your biological son for you to love him and care about his well-being. I know this better than anyone!

    Anyway, Good luck with everything! The adjustment is the best part! I know we don't know each other, but if you ever need a fellow stepmom to talk to, I'm always around your blog!

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  55. I am a full time stepmom to four kiddos. No biological of my own. The situation behind why we have full custody is a sad one. However, we are a family and they are the biggest blessing of my life. If you ever need stepmom advice, feel free. I'm only a year into my journey and its not always easy, but very much worth it.

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  56. That is great news and so wonderful. 3 year olds are really tough to handle (you know how people say terrible 2s? nope, it's 3s that are rough, 2 is lovely). I have a 3 year old (and a 5 year old). You'll have so much fun and a lot of frustration as well, but it will be for the best. I had no idea that Mike had a son, but that's really sweet that he has custody now. You can see Toby's daddy in him!!! Congratulations and may all go well in your parenting. That is terrible that people would tell you things like you'd never get custody or aren't his step mom. terrible how people would be rude about anyone wanting to step up and care for a child at all!

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  57. It's posts like this that help solidify that things do happen for a reason! It sounds like Toby is where he is supposed to be and it is wonderful that you have the space needed to provide for him (both physically & emotionally). I think it is silly when people make rude comments about people's ability to love another. You know what is in your heart and so do Toby & Mike.

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  58. I can't stop grinning after reading this post. I am so happy for y'all. What ever the circumstances were that he came to y'all, what matters is how he is loved and cared for now that he is with you. Parents are who brought you into the world. Mom and Dad are who make you into the person you will become. Do the best that you can at being a Mom and you will do just fine. It already sounds like you are doing a stellar job of it in such a short time.

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  59. Congratulations! Such wonderful news! xxx

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  60. Congratulations! What an exciting adventure to begin, (and perfect practice for that baby fever :) I wish you and your new little family all the joy in the world!

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  61. Wow that is huge! You are so amazing - I feel so far from motherhood! It's so wonderful to hear how excited you guys are - congrats! And I can't believe people were being mean to you before about it! Silly haters!

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  62. Congratulations!! This is going to be such an exciting time for you guys. He is absolutely adorable, and I can tell that he is going to grow up into a happy, healthy, and smart kid having you and Mike as parents. Congrats Mom! ;)

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  63. I wish you all the best with rising him together, children are great (though they're monsters from time to time :))

    Even if you are not his biological mother the love you are/will give him will return to you mutliplied!

    Greetings from the Netherland!

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  64. That's such great news! I'm almost to the point of tears. Don't listen to what those other people say. It sounds like he's in the best family environment imaginable. What a lucky boy!

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  65. Wow! Congrats,y'all! That's great news! Toby's such a cutie! :D

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  66. congrats! that's amazing! toby is so lucky to have you both in his life and you will be a fabulous momma to him.

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  67. I'm so excited for you guys! I know he's going to be raised to be a proper young man!
    I can't wait to see your journey together!

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  68. Congratulations! I know that you & Mike will provide an amazing, loving, fun home for him!

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  69. Wow, Kaelah! I haven't been reading long enough to know of Toby, I had no idea that Mike had a son. It sounds like you guys are totally over the moon and what more could a kid ask for? So happy for you guys and wish you all the best. I look forward to hearing more about him and this new chapter in your lives.

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  70. Congrats hun! & don't let anyone ever tell you that you can't be more then a step-mother to him. My step-mother raised me and is my mother, I even call her mom. Mother's don't have to be biological they are people who love and care about you and are there when you need someone. (I'm not trying to say his mother isn't a good mother seeing that I don't know the situation)

    You're such a great person and I know he'll become a great kid. I can't wait to see more of him!

    -Madeline Grace
    Just Let the Sparrows Fly

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  71. Congratulations. As a long time reader (and lurker!) I just wanted to wish you all the best. xxx

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  72. I'm so happy for you both. I don't understand why people would leave nasty comments.

    <3

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  73. Wow Kaelah, what happy news! I wish you and Mike all the best in your new family :)

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  74. i was thinking this was the big news!!! i can't even imagine how crazy it would be to suddenly have a 3yr old in the house but i know you both will be amazing parents together. good luck with everything, you'll be great!!

    Krystle

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  75. Kaelah, I can't even tell you how happy and excited I am for you. That's such a major bummer that people who THINK they know you are posting such heartless comments to you. Anyway, let them slide right off. I can't wait to see how your relationship with Toby grows and deepens. Thanks for sharing!

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  76. Wow. I am a longtime reader but don't comment often. I wanted to wish you all the best with your new found family!!! As overwhelming as it might feel, I can imagine it will be your/Mike's best adventure yet! Amazing news :)

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  77. Oh Kaelah! That's wonderful news! Man, I didn't even know Mike had a kid. Toby is absolutely precious! Now the girls have a play mate! Yay! Congratulations to your sweet expanding family! God knew you needed a bigger house and it came at a perfect time! I will be praying that the adjustment period is a smooth one. Can't wait to read and see more of this sweet boy! You guys will be amazing parents, no doubt.

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  78. Oh this is wonderful news Kaelah! I'm very happy for both you and Mike! I have a feeling you all will make a wonderful little family. xx

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  79. Congrats! I'm so very happy for you guys! I have been following you for a while now and I am in love with all your stories. I hope your new life treats you well (how couldn't with a little man so handsome?) and has many amazing memories! xo Katlyn

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  80. Congratulations Mike and Kaelah! Do the girls love having a toddler in the house?!

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    1. They do! Georgia remembers him from when he was just a baby so that was good! They just want to play with him and cuddle constantly!

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  81. AWW!! I thought this might be what was going on from your instagram pictures but didn't want to ask any questions till you felt comfortable letting everyone know. How wonderful, exciting and amazing!! You guys are going to be the greatest parents. I'll be waiting for posts about your adorable family. :) Congrats!! Excited to see what the future has to hold for you guys! Weddings, kids, family, yay!

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  82. Ahhh! This is so exciting! I don't think I was a reader when you mentioned him before but you seem so excited about it and I'm so happy for your! I wish you the best of luck and can't wait to see more or your "family" life now ;) Hang in there girl!
    Sam

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  83. Oh, Kaelah, this is so darling. It was just lovely to see the 2 of you with Toby the other night at Grandma's house...you had wonderful expressions of delight and love and exasperation and love and questioning and love...he is definitely in the right place, as Mike said earlier last week. You go, girl. Get those sharks done and those Power Rangers watched. There will be time for coffee jaunts when you guys are alone again in 20+ years!

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  84. Oh my goodness lady!!! Congratulations!!!!!!!!!! You and Mike are going to be excellent parents - the perfect team and now the perfect trio. :) enjoy every moment of motherhood, the good and the bad, the happy and the sad, the funny and the frustrating. :) Much love to your and yours!

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  85. Congratulations! Best wishes to you and your family as you settle in. You have a great heart, attitude, and obviously the best intentions with Toby. Have fun on this amazing new journey!

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  86. I vote a room picture when you get it all done up!

    Blood does NOT make you a parent. I need to do a blog post on this subject, but my boyfriend basically aquired my son at 3 months old. He is all he knows as a father figure but calls him "Chris". He doesn't know what a "daddy" is. I would rather him have a Chris any day. Also I was adopted and my parents are my parents. End of story. All that matters is you shower that child with love. I'm not sure where the "you don't choose your family" thing came from but I don't think that's always true. And from reading your blog for so long I KNOW you will be a wonderful mother.

    <3 Rae

    http://dramaticatticboutique.blogspot.com

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  87. That is great new! I am so excited for you!!! I have a 4 year old little sister and I think it is the perfect age. Kids are the greatest I just know y'all will enjoy all the great family time. Plus if you get veggi hot dog and cut the bottom and put a face on top (with mustard or ketchup) it looks like an octopus, my sister love to eat "octopus" soup.

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  88. Ahhh! I'm so happy for you guys! Seriously this is like the best news I've heard in a long time from anyone! I know how hard things can be with that situation going on because I was the little girl in between the madness with my mom, step mom and dad. I never got to see my dad much when I was little until i was 12 when I moved in. even though i was a lot older than Toby I think I can relate to what is going on. I'm so happy for you guys!!!! Now he can be the little ring bearer at your wedding!!! So cute!

    Marja,
    xoxo

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  89. How wonderful for you guys! He is just precious and I'm sure he'll love having a stable, loving environment to grow up in. I'm sure he loves your doggies as well!

    And I agree with what lots of others have said: blood relation does NOT make you a parent! I was adopted at birth and my adoptive parents ARE my REAL parents! I've never met my birth parents and don't really need to. I have quite the awesome family and since they raised me, they're my real family!

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  90. I'm excited for you guys, sounds like you both are already making Toby feel right at home! My son is 3 for another couple of weeks, I can tell you that being 3 is all about playing, try to get him around other kids (i think classes are great! swimming, gymnastics, etc), get him ready for preschool.. learn those numbers, the alphabet, colors and shapes, let him play with scissors and glue, most of all enjoy all the time you can with him before he heads off to school and you don't get to be with him 24/7! Super excited for you guys and you're going to have so much fun being a mommy!

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  91. Whoa, that's amazing! Congratulations with your new family member :) And how nice that he will be there on your wedding.

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  92. I am so happy for you, and for your happiness! Make sure that you treasure every moment etc etc and make the most of this very very exciting time!

    That being said, and I hate to post something negative on such a positive post, please don't go to aquariums or zoos! They are very cruel by nature, and are just overall horrible institutions. A dolphin's average lifespan in the wild is 40-50 years, in captivity it is usually less than 10. That's horrible! Especially with you loving sharks as much as you do, the right thing for you to do if you truly do love them is to not support institutions that profit off of their captivity!!! I know that aquariums will feed you propaganda about how they are REALLY GREAT for the animals but after doing a lot of research on this I know that it is not true at all!!!! Please hear me out on this one and AGAIN I'm so happy for you!!! Good luck and have a ton of cruelty free fun!

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  93. CONGRATS! I was wondering who that little boy eating pb&j was on your twitter :) Being a mommy is hard work and being a step-mommy is just as hard. 3 is a crazy age, especially potty training a boy! My son is 12 now...enjoy him as much as you can, because they really do grow up fast!

    xo,
    Eeka
    http://ericaliveloverandom.blogspot.com/

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  94. Congratulations!! I'm so happy for you guys!! :)

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  95. Congratulations! He is adorable! (Isn't it terrible that we have to use such non-masculine words for our little boys?!) I'm blown away by anyone who would say something non-encouraging... You open yourself up to us, how dare anyone not respect that? Regardless, you and Mike will be wonderful parents and he is absolutely your beautiful new son. So happy for you two!

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  96. I'm so incredibly happy for you! good luck!

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  97. This is an absolutely amazing story. I'm so happy for you and Mike (and Toby!).

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  98. I am excited for you because you are excited!

    And as so many others have posted, my stepdad took me as his own even when I had done most of my growing up already.

    You will be a blessing in Toby's life :)

    And I can't wait to see outfit outtakes of his little shining face! ;)

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  99. What an amazing, wonderful, fun, scary time in your life! I started reading this before work, but had to stop so I wouldn't walk in with teary eyes. (Being 30 weeks pregnant will do that) You guys are going to be such amazing and involved parents! You never do anything halfway. Enjoy this beautiful blessing. I know you will.

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  100. Congrats! I'm so happy for you and Mike and wish you the best of luck!

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  101. Congratulations! What a crazy, exciting time for you! I can't wait to see pictures of his shark themed room, too cute.

    I look forward to hearing about all of your new momma adventures!

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  102. Congratulations!! I'm really happy for you guys! I wasn't around for Toby early on, but I look forward to seeing his appearance here in the future! He's a cutie pie.

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  103. Beautiful, just beautiful. Big smile on my face right now.

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  104. My goodness little lady!! What a big change!! GOOD LUCK with everything, just take it one day at a time and remember to BREATHE every so oftenn! <3

    Sending nothing but love your way!

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  105. My goodness little lady!! What a big change!! GOOD LUCK with everything, just take it one day at a time and remember to BREATHE every so oftenn! <3

    Sending nothing but love your way!

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  106. Oh wow, what news.
    I'm sorry to hear that the little dude had so many problems in his life already. It most have been horrible to not be able to see him. I don't even want to know how the little guy must feel. I'm really happy for you and especially mike! I'd be so terrified and excited at the same time, I can totally understand how crazy but wonderful that all must be for you two. I'm positive that you will be a great and wonderful stepmom!!! The little guy is so lucky to have you in his life!!!!! Really happy for all of you!!!! :)

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  107. congrats mama! this is so exciting and such a great age too! they talk, they kinda know what they want and they say the funniest things! you guys are gonna have so so much fun!
    xo,
    cb

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  108. Good for you! I wish you all the best!

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  109. What amazing news! Congratulations c:
    I hope you three are having a lovely time! xx

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  110. I, like some others here, had no idea there was a precious little boy in the picture. I feel so sad for you that you had to endure such awful negativity from people in your past posts about Toby. (Truthfully, I'd like to punch those people in the face. Ha.) And it makes me sad for this little boy that he has had so much turmoil in his life. I've seen this kind of things firsthand working as a child advocate in the family court system....

    BUT, I am beyond happy and excited for this little boy to now have a mom (yes, you will be a mom to him! no matter what anyone says) and a dad who are so loving, kind, nurturing, creative, fun and amazing examples of joy. One lucky kid indeed. Your love for him is so evident in the sacrifices you have and will make... the things that may seem like sacrifices to everyone else but to you it's a no-brainer. : ) I love that. Sending nothing but positive thoughts, prayers and encouragement to you and Mike as you transition into this new kind of life and to that precious little boy of yours as well. I'm sure he will be smothered with love and that will make this huge transition for him much easier. Thanks so much for sharing this part of your life... you certainly didn't have to but I'm glad I got the opportunity to hear this story. It's just amazing. : )

    Love from Colorado!

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  111. wow - i glanced at your tags and they are completely accurate. kudos to you for being so incredibly positive about something so life changing. toby seems like a sweet kid and is extremely lucky to have someone as wonderful and flexible in his life :)

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  112. So many congratulations. You guys will be such a great team and I'm so happy even a bit of your baby fever will be satisfied! I can't wait to see the mama side of you and to hear all the funny stories that come with a 3-year-old. Endless love and good vibes being sent to you and your now bigger family <3

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  113. I wish I could effectively put into words just how unbelieveably happy I am for Mike and yourself on hearing this. Absolutely beaming smile on my face right now and it does not want to budge! I had a sneaky suspicion this is what was going on and I'm beyond excited that things have worked out for you guys. It used to be so lovely to read about Toby's adventures and my heart broke for Mike when I realised there was a none-too-good situation going on with him. So, yeah, I can't recall ever being this happy for someone I don't actually know before.

    I just hope Toby has been okay through all this, he's a brave little man. And, Toby, I hope you have a blast living with your dad and step-mum (they're not all evil, you've for sure got yourself the best one you could ask for!).

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  114. you can hear the love you have for toby in your every word. i am certain he'll be so well cared for by you and mike. life is going to be so different now for you but you already know that and that shows such wisdom and maturity and your eyes are so wide open. i admire you so much and can't be happier for you all in this amazing step into the incredible world of full-time parenting. much happiness to you and yours hun, always.

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  115. This is beautiful, and you explained it with such graciousness. Congratulations to both of you, looking forward to hearing more about your sweet family.

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  116. Aww, that's so amazing. Congrats to you both!

    http://juffielovesstyles.blogspot.com/

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  117. This is the sweetest post. I am so happy for you guys my eyes literally watered. Good for you and your little family, I can tell already this is going to be amazing. I can't wait to see more!

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  118. Wow! congratulations!!
    I know it must be a scary time for ye both but like everything else you two do together its going to be awesome! Im so happy you were able to share with us!

    xx

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  119. Absolutely Fantastic news. So happy for the three of you XXX

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  120. So happy for you! Really we have a very simalar situation going on and I am sooo happy to see this work out for you! It's scary as all hell, I'm sure, but so good for everyone! Congrats! & ENJOY!!!!!

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  121. How sweet! <3 I had seen some photos on Instagram, and I was wondering who that adorable little kid was ;) I know you'll be an awesome mom, whether you're his biological-"real" mom or not. Trust me, I have an adopted brother, and as long as you love them, it makes no difference! So excited to see how this new chapter in your life works out.

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  122. Such a lovely post, I am so happy for all three of you! Your love for him and mike totally shines through in your writing and it is so apparent that you'll take such good care of him! Sending you so much love! <3<3

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  123. Congratulations. I know you'll be a fabulous step-momma, and don't let the naysayers get to you. Some people will do anything to mar a happy, happy moment.

    Much love to the three of you!

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  124. this made me tear up, i'm so happy for you. i'm glad mike is able to be apart of his life forever now & toby will have two very supportive, constant and loving people in his life.

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  125. I don't comment much but I am a regular reader! Kids are such a blessing and they teach us just as much, if not more, than we teach them! Congrats! I'm so happy for you guys!

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  126. This is such great news for you guys! My BF's parents have custody of their grandson, sometimes the best place for a child isn't with the biological mother. I'm sure you guys will be great at raising him together. What a cutie he is :)

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  127. Congratulations to all three of you! And don't you dare listen to those people who tell you you're not his "real" mom. Just because you didn't give birth to him doesn't mean you're not his mom, or one of his moms. Not everything is so black and white!

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  128. Oh my goodness! He's a cutie! I'm so happy for you guys! You would definitely make a great team for raising babies, and this little guy as well! Congrats Mama!

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  129. I'm so incredibly happy for you! I know you guys are going to be great parents to Toby, and you're going to be a great mama!

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  130. This officially makes you guys the Flynn family =) congrats again!

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  131. Wow, what exciting news!

    A friend of mine who had always said children were a dealbreaker just got together with a guy with a kid the same age as Toby - she was nervous at first but it turns out the stepmother thing really did kick in. I bet you'll be amazing.

    Here's to a happy future for your little family.

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  132. What an incredibly lucky little boy Toby is! Congratulations and best wishes - this is totally fantastic. I'm sure it'll be terrifying and challenging, but you'll be fine. Better than that, you'll be wonderful. All three of you (and the girls!) will be as well. xox

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  133. Congratulations beyond congratulations!!!! What an amazing thing, and YOU are amazing for having the attitude and outlook you have. Sure those people may technically be right, you won't ever be his 'birth' mom. But they're beyond wrong in the sense that you can become a mom to him. And while I don't know you personally(wish I did! Your blog is awesome and you seem like the coolest!), I think you will be the best mom Toby could ever ask for. Congrats again to you and Mike. What an amazing time :):)

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  134. CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU ALL! I can't imagine anyone having a negative thing to say about someone loving another human being as if they were their own. Keep up the great work you will make and are a lovely family already! oxox

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  135. I don't comment very often, but congratu-freaking-lations! I'm sure you'll make a good mommy! :D

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  136. oh wow this is fantastic news!!! Congratulations Mamma!!! I can't imagine how hard it has been for you in the past and it really disappoints me that people would say mean things to you in this situation. It is clear how much you love him - someone doesn't have to be biologically yours for you to love him like your own - you are a perfect example of that x

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  137. That is amazing! I'm really happy for you guys. It's going to be a lot of work but you obviously don't take that lightly. I for one will be very forgiving of having to read about sick days and potty training :)

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  138. Kaelah, congratulations! He seems like the sweetest little thing and I am SO, SO HAPPY that he now has you guys in his life, permanently, to fill his world with joy and laughter. The love you have for him is precious and beautiful, and I'm praying for you guys as you enter this part of your journey.

    xoxo!

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  139. I am feeling so much excitement for you!! I don't even "know you", but the happinness I feel is just so big!! Wish you and your family the best, especially for that cutie pie! xxxx
    Alice Barton ♥ The Mow Way

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  140. WOW that is HUGE news and I'm so excited for the 3 of you. You are going to be a great mumma and (blows raspberries) to anyone that thinks otherwise! xo

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  141. I'm another reader who doesn't comment often but oh my goodness, this is so amazing! Congratulations, wishing your little family all the joy and magic in the universe! xx

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  142. WOWZERS! You guys are in for a roller coaster ride! I have a 3 year old boy also and it's such an awesome age. As someone who was raised by a non-biological parent (my dad entered my life at 3), I can honestly say, it does not matter about the biological factor....what matters is the LOVE....and let me tell you lovely lady.....that is what kids need : ) Just remember there is no perfect parent, we all make mistakes!! Good Luck!! PS. I'm a long time reader of you're fab blog! Love and Peace xox

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  143. This little guy is lucky to have so much love coming his way. His love for sharks makes him such a cool little dude. Enjoy this new chapter of your lives together.

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  144. Dude, I love you. Congrats on the new addition! I have no doubt you two will provide a wonderful home and upbringing for that little cutie. What a blessing on all sides!

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  145. Congrats! That is so exciting. You two seem like you will have no problem being perfect parents! I wish you both the best of luck. xo

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  146. Oh, you lovely lady - congratulations! As the mama of a soon-to-be 3 year old myself, I know nothing about your journey will be easy but it will be the best thing that ever happened to you & more importantly, him. He is truly lucky to have someone so loving, playful & level-headed in his life. Your new family is in my thoughts & when we move back from Australia, I'll be requesting a playdate (okay, that might be too weird & stalkerish). xoxo

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  147. How exciting! That's great news. I hope you all are very happy & a boy who loves sharks too sounds like you were all meant to be! Looking forward to more updates! X

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  148. Congratulations you guys! This gives me so much hope for my brother! His (now ex) girlfriend left him last month and took his 1 year old daughter with them. She's playing lots of games and often not letting him see her. It's a really messed up situation and without going into too much detail I will basically say her mother's home (where she is staying) is NOT a safe environment for her. I'm hoping things work out in his favor and reading this has made me so happy for you and really has given me hope for our family!!

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  149. Oh wow, I am SO, SO happy for you and Mike! Toby is so adorable and you guys are going to be seriously wonderful parents. Just the way you write about him and about everything you want to give him and teach him shows what a natural you are at parenting. He's so lucky to have you!
    xo, Natasha

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  150. Congrats! From someone who was adopted herself, it doesn't matter whether you are his biological mother or not, as long as you love him and treat him like your own (like you already plan on doing!) everything will be just fine. Good luck and I look forward to hearing more about him and the family you and Mike are putting together :)

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  151. Congratulations, he is going to have a super life with you two :D x

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  152. Wow!! What a huge and wonderful change! Kudos to you guys for handling it so well and trying to seamlessly add him into your lives! Having babies can be tricky, and you have 9 months to mentally prepare! :) He's very lucky to have you guys. Congratulations <3

    JenB

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  153. Aww yay that's so exciting! Congratulations to the both of you guys. xx

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  154. Congrats!!!!! 3 is such an awesome age, that's the age one of my brothers was when my parents adopted him. Such fun times with him, indoor camping, reading, movie nights etc.
    Lots of xoxoxo!

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  155. Congrats and enjoy every second! They grow up way too fast; I nanny for a soon-to-be three-year-old and I feel like every time I see him he's gotten bigger! :]

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  156. Wow! How exciting for you guys!! :D wishing you all the best with this super cute little boy :) can't wait to see his shark-themed bedroom I bet it'll be awesome! :)

    Kc

    a-sparkley-silver-lining.blogspot.com

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  157. congrats!! The lil boy is so cute and I'm happy to see other people being happy

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  158. Hey lovely, I hope you and your little family have enough health, love, and happiness to last many lifetimes.

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  159. Congratulations! I don't even know you but I am so excited for your little family. Life can be so beautifully unexpected
    and I'm sure someday that little boy will grow into a great man and always thank you for helping him be that way.

    Fortune favors the brave.

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  160. i'm glad you at least shared this. such a beautiful story! i'm sure you'll be a great stepmom!

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  161. Road trips are GREAT educational experiences. Gosh, take him everywhere you go. Our son goes to antique fairs with us and flea markets. He's an excellent bidder at auctions at five. Kids can have fun anywhere and you look like you'll be a super fun, creative mom. Many parents adopt and start right out with a toddler so there is support out there for you! Take some parenting classes and sign up for a local mother's group. You are going to be great and remember, none of us as mothers are perfect!

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  162. Congratulations! What a darling little boy! I work with children in crisis and have long observed--and often blogged--that there are two types of mamas. The first type are My Own Kids Mamas who only have the capacity to love their own kids (which I am not judgemental of because I am just pleased that their own kids are getting love), and the second type are World Mamas (women who have the ability to love all the innocent little souls of the world). Simply through following your blog, I can tell you are a World Mama and that Toby will be infinitely lucky to have you in his life. :)

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  163. I'm so happy for you and Mike. All the best.

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  164. Congratulations! I'm so excited for you and your little family.

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  165. Congratulations! So nice to hear that everything turned out alright for all of you <3

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  166. Congratulations! I wish you guys all the best. xx

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  167. This is such lovely news Kaelah, it really is. Very happy for you and you're lovely little family. Much love xx

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  168. You definitely deserve being a mother, just make sure you have plenty of time for you as much as you will have for him! :]

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  169. Congratulations to you and Mike!!

    I cannot believe anyone would say such things as you'll never be his mother! To quote Little Miss Spider "for finding your mother there's one simple test, just look for the creature who loves you the best".

    Paula
    lifeasweknowitbypaula.blogspot.com

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  170. Congrats Kaelah! You are going to be such a great mother to this sweet little boy.

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  171. How wonderful! I'm so glad Toby will have a happy home with you two. As someone who was adopted, I can say that a mother does not need to be flesh and blood to be super rad. :)

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  172. How wonderful! You will be a great Mommy-congratulations to you all :)

    Adrienne
    What Lola Wants

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  173. how exciting! toby is a lucky little dude to have someone who is going to treat him with so much love! and i totally recommend a nashville zoo membership. with it you can get in free to the louisville, chatanooga, and knoxville zoo (among many others) and a few parent friends of mine say that their big playground is a life saver some days!
    it makes me so happy to see a young future step mom so stoked about her new responsibility. I can't wait to see his room!

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  174. oh Kaelah, this is incredible. I am so happy for you! And don't you let anyone's responses or bad attitudes towards whatever the situation is get to you. EVER.

    What a beautiful blessing.

    And where did the little tyke's room come from?!?! Did you guys have to take one of the extra rooms you had planned for something else and use it as a bedroom for Toby?

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    1. Yeah we live in a 3 bedroom house so we have a bedroom, an office for me and then we had a Honeybean studio to keep inventory and work on Hive + Honey pieces, so we had to move the Honeybean room to a storage facility! We didn't mind one bit though! :D

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  175. What a cute little nugget. Congratultions on your new little family.

    Vintagehoneybee.blogspot.com

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  176. I wanted to say congratulations on your amazing new addition and life adventure! I'm sure you'll find happiness in places you never knew existed.

    Hope you're well :)
    Betsy

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    1. Thank you Betsy! What a pleasant surprise. I've been wanting/meaning to send you a message on FB for a bit now, but I really appreciate your kind words :) It means a lot. Hope you and Adam are doing well!

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  177. Congratulations! That sounds so wonderful. I'm so happy for your family.

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  178. My stepson was the same age when I came into the picture, and honestly it was hard at the beginning. BUT it did get better (he's almost 11) and each year he gets older and can do more for himself has been so fun. Sounds like you guys will have sole custody(?) so you can parent as you please and not worry about someone else's wants and schedule.

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  179. Congratz on your family! I'm sure you all will adjust beautifully and be great parents. Don't let the negative crap get to ya'll. I admire you both.
    P.s enjoy this time, they grow up sooo fast.

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  180. That almost left me in tear of happiness! What a lucky little boy!!

    Sounds the pieces are fitting together into a beautiful picture... which reminds me of a song...

    "But if the world could remain within a frame like a painting on a wall.
    Then I think we would see the beauty.
    Then we would stand staring in awe at our still lives posed like a bowl of oranges,
    like a story told by the fault lines and the soil." - bright eyes

    So Beautiful >.<

    <3 Kara
    www.lovekarabella.blogspot.com

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  181. makes me sick that anyone could ever comment about adoption, step-parenting, etc. in a negative way. it is a hard enough job on its own without any negativity. congrats on your little guy. what an honor to be the one to come into his life and make a difference for the better. wonderful to hear how well you are taking things in stride--that is the only way parenting can be successful/fun/AMAZING. so much love.

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  182. I am so incredibly happy for you and Mike. Despite you saying you love him I could feel that love from the beginning of the post. You are and an amazing person and amazing MOTHER! Mike is truly blessed to have someone so supportive and caring as you are. I wish you all, all the best.I have a three year old daughter, and she brings me joy each day.

    love and good wishes xx

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  183. You're going to be such wonderful parents Toby is so lucky to have you in his life. Remember you can do this no worries! Good Luck! Toby is so lucky!!!

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  184. What a crazy exciting adventure. I just had a baby so I know what you mean by all the changes. Although I will admit I'm a bit jealous that your new addition will sleep through the night. ;)

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  185. holy cow! that's so exciting :D
    you guys will make such rad parents!!

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  186. I saw this on my phone yesterday and couldn't comment, so today... HOORAY! I do not comment nearly enough, but this deserves only the happiest of words! ♥x121093823847203429834

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  187. Congratulations!!! How exciting :D x

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  188. For what it's worth, you have my support and admiration! Every child deserves a loving home.

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  189. What an adorable kid :) You'll make a great parent, and I bet his little friends are gonna try to hit on you cause your so pretty! lol. I hope we see more of him on the blog! :D

    <3 Jenny

    http://sincerelyjennyemm.blogspot.com/

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  190. that is amazing news, congratulations! i'm sure you'll be great parents! good luck with everything and enjoy every second of it (:
    xo, cheyenne

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  191. This is so sweet :)
    Tobey is such a Cutee from what I can see of this picture.
    You'll do this well.

    With regard from Germany

    Jenny

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  192. He is a lucky little boy to have two people who will love and care for him so much, I have a little boy who is 4 and I tell you I just love that boy so much, they just bring rainbows and love into life, enjoy x

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HEY! Thanks for dropping by. xo KB