Honest To Blog -- Being Connected

(♥ source ♥)

I've had a new Honest to Blog topic in my head for weeks now, but every time I sit down to write the words, nothing comes to mind. I'm finding it hard to convey what I'm trying to say, so another topic hit me yesterday as I was approaching 29 hours without a cell phone... yeah, tragedy, right? My trusty ol' iPhone met it's fate with a concrete floor Friday and I won't be able to get a replacement until later today. Doesn't seem like that big of a deal, I know, but even just 30 hours later I'm realizing how truly connected I am at all times. If it's not blogging it's Twitter, or Instagram, or browsing the internet and forums. Sometimes it's playing games or reading tabloids. Then when I'm really desperate, Facebook. I honestly can't tell you the longest I've gone without checking my phone... it's always in my hand. (Also why I lose it so much... instead of just leaving it in my purse where it belongs, I conveniently put it down somewhere and forget!) I went to work Friday night without a phone. No way to call, text, email or communicate with anyone who wasn't in my bar. No weekend work rants on Twitter. No cries for entertainment on Tumblr. Nothing. And you know what? It was kind of nice. I still don't know what calls or texts I've missed. I have no clue what's going on on Instagram. I've missed days worth of the "photo a day" prompts... and I'm strangely fine. I've grown so accustomed to having that thin piece of technology permanently attached to my person, I've forgotten what it's like to just step away from the internet. Maybe bloggers are especially prone to this sort of addiction, considering we all share so much of our lives online. Strangers and friends alike can keep tabs on us. Thanks to social media, I am always up to date on what Sally Jo ate for breakfast, lunch and dinner... daily. It's not all newsworthy press, sure. But there are those gems you stumble across thanks to the internet super highway. Still, I've had to ask myself the past two days, how connected is too connected? It's a total first world problem to be without my cellphone, that's a no-brainer... but what did we all do before the internet? Before cellphones? Before smartphones?! 

I remember getting the internet for my 12th birthday... it was this exciting new place. I made friends almost instantly. Some of those I still talk to today! I played sports in school, and hung out with friends, but I never had homework so if I were home, I was on the 'net. (The 'Net! Ah, nostalgia!) Not too long after my introduction to the interwebs, I started a LiveJournal. I bet some of you had those right?! That's where I learned how to overshare. Oh gosh, I can't even. I'm eternally embarrassed by the hefty majority of things I wrote on the internet prior to 2010. It's true. Anyway, blogging has taught that there is such a thing as oversharing. I've read blogs in the past that just... golly, put it all out there, to put it nicely! Even as recently as a month or two ago I've decided topics that just don't need to be discussed via open internet. We all have our fine lines... what you choose to discuss via your outlet is your call. We all feel differently about it. But what amazes me is how tied we can be to the internet. Some people just have that need or desire to share things. I definitely fall into that category when it comes to Twitter. Half of my Twitter feed is just work rants and things I ate for lunch... stuff that doesn't even remotely matter to the general public. Yet I still share them. I'm reading this as I write it and laughing at myself because goodness knows that the minute I get my new iPhone (or get mine fixed, whatever the case may be) I'll be tweeting up a storm and Instagramming any and everything once more. It's so second nature to us. (And yes, I'm lumping you into that "us" even though "you" probably have more sense than I do when it comes to talking about your laundry detergent or asking a question on Twitter rather than just Googling it)

I've kind of built up this belief that I "can't live" without my iPhone. It does everything for me. Camera, phone, social media, internet, GPS, notepad, games, etc. It's a real piece of work, that's for sure. (Thanks Steve!) I can't go 2 hours without tweeting, I can't go 2 days without blogging. I almost start to feel a sort of "obligation" to do those things since I've chosen to share my world with everyone. It's so silly to say that and I know I'm going to be laughing/cringing in embarrassment when I publish this. (For those who don't know, Honest to Blog is free of any edits... so that's why this is so jumbled!) I've read blogs of people who have decided to cut back on the internet and step away for a while. Closing accounts here and there, and only partaking every once in a while. That mindset is awesome and I applaud anyone who does it, but I don't want it to have to come down to an "all or nothing" game for me. I know many bloggers choose to not blog on the weekends for whatever reason and like I mentioned earlier, some fence certain topics to keep off limits. Whatever the case may be, I just don't want to be that person who people constantly say "Why on Earth would she tell people that?!". Irrelevant food and off-hand thought tweets aside, it feels good to survey everything and see where I'm allocating my time and energy. It takes a lot of work to keep up with everyone's tweets, pictures and posts... seriously. On most days I don't even bother and I only follow ~250 people on Twitter. That's why when I get to a place like this, I ask myself "Who even cares?!?!" Harsh maybe, but sometimes I need to reign myself in I guess. 

This whole post isn't making much sense but I guess it's a forum for me to open up discussion and ask you how you handle your online time. I've mentioned Rescue Time before and even still, I haven't weaned myself off of my internet guilty pleasures. Do you have topics you deem to be totally off limits for internet conversation? Are you guilty of the silly irrelevant tweets like me? 

I know a gal who limits her online time to one hour a day (that's pretty impressive!) because that's what works for her. I don't think I could ever make that work for me (then again, once I become a mom I'll probably be all about it!) but it's worth a wonder. I've met so many wonderful people through the internet and I love keeping up with all of them (even if that means knowing exactly what brand chili powder they buy at the supermarket), but sometimes it's just too much. Sometimes it's nice to turn off the phone, avoid all email, and just enjoy present company. Watch a movie, go to the park, grab ice cream or go for a drive without the constant need to document it. This is totally anti-new year's resolution for me (to take more pictures/document "real life") but I'm hoping I can find a way to make both of them work simultaneously. There's that silly picture above and it's so spot on. A few months ago we were at the City and Colour show here in Nashville and Dallas asked the audience to just put the phones and cameras down for one song... just one. It amazed me how many people couldn't just sit for three minutes without snapping a photo. I understand trying to document memories and moments, but when does it cross over and become the problem? We miss so much of life's happenings because we're too busy figuring out our cameras or phones or letting the world know we just ate the most delicious panini at this cafe... It seems so counterproductive to blogging, but I'm curious if any of you have found ways to make the most of it, while still being able to share those adventures with the online world. 

This isn't one of those posts with a fool-proof answer as it's simply a matter of opinion. I know I'll be obsessively tweeting and Instagramming again later today but hopefully I can remember how nice it was to disconnect for a bit and enjoy life as it happens. Feel free to share your thoughts below if you have any. This lacks the drama or emotion that a lot of my HTB posts have, but I still thought it was worth touching base on!

Now I'm going to go enjoy some lovely friends who are showing at a bridal event today. Then I'll come home and recount how many tweets and pictures I share from said event and call myself a hypocrite! Have a lovely Sunday friends! xo

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Honest To Blog is a weekly free-writing series on LCH where I share my thoughts, feelings and frustrations with all of my readers. 100% unedited, unbiased, and sometimes unpopular, you can often find a boatload of typos just by glancing at it. Click here to read the rest of the series!


  1. I remember when my iphone got 'bricked' after trying to update it to ios5 and I was without it for one whole day - luckily I kept myself busy but gosh it WAS hard! I am a bit of an addict but I find myself leaving it in another room on purpose when I was to watch a film or something, just to relax a bit more. However, I do LOVE watching things on tv and tweeting along as other people are watching it! I started off with livejournal in about 2003 too and it has grown since there. It is weird that we are the first generation of over-sharers, I wonder whether our children will become addicts like us too?

  2. I think having a break once in a while is good for everyone. Thats why I always liked going on trips to visit my cousins in the states. We couldn't use our phones because we would get charged extra for it and their second house doesn't have any internet and barely a tv. Its nice for a few days to just sit around a fire, talk, play games, go for walks...

  3. i can definitely relate. i might not feel the need to share so much all the time, but i'm constantly afraid i'll miss out on something important unless i check my rss reader, facebook, twitter, instagram, you name it X amount of times a day. it's a drug, that's what it is. (and oh what a sweet one!) but to be honest, i don't know if i'll ever be willing to give it up. isn't it a bit sad to think about how many hours you spend keeping track of all of these social medias, and imagine what you could have done with all of that time? i fight off those thoughts and reach for my iphone.

  4. When I started blogging at the beginning of this year, I had a few topics in my head that I deemed totally inappropriate to share (any family/boyfriend issues, ailments, etc), but now the longer I've been blogging, the more I've seen how open people are. It's so weird to me to see people telling EVERYTHING that is going on in their lives. I like being able to share with others, but i feel like there has to be some boundaries... Its hard to find where your own boundaries should be though.


  5. I think it's important to stand back off the swivel chair every now and then and remember that the internet used to be something that was a luxury! Dial-up was such a nightmare to get onto that it was like a little treat when AOL actually loaded. Like alot of things, I think we take the internet much too seriously. It can be your lifeline, maybe even your entire source of income, but it is something that is very changeable and frivolous - I really believe that if you keep that in the back of your mind it can be a lot easier to step away now and then and find peace and quiet when you disconnect instead of worrying about missed emails and texts. I think you can kind of compare the internet to a toddler - it's so fickle, it can laugh with you one minute and turn on you the next, but you have to enjoy it for what it is, not what you wish it would be or what it changes in your life.

    I wish I could be clearer in what I'm trying to say! I completely agree with you though, it's sort of nice to turn my phone off for an hour every day and read a book for a while, which is what I do. It's kind of like I'm taking charge and doing something completely selfish for once...if that makes sense.

    As for off-limit blogging, I'm undecided. I'm so new to the blogging world, but I've still read things that I'm a little shocked by, simply because the blogger is being so honest and seemingly genuine. I couldn't care less what people talk about, but I think there's only so much you can reveal before you cross over into boasting, or alienating people. If I feel uncomfortable reading something, I'll click off - that usually happens when I'm reading things that remind me of tabloid trash. Too much whining, no connection with the audience, topics that are as deep and thought-provoking as a puddle. I think that if you are writing for an audience, it's essential to engage them on a very human level. Being human has it's ups and downs, so if you want to write about a bad day, I think it's important to stop and think "If I was reading this, would I feel sad/depressed/angry?" You aren't helping anyone, including yourself, by flying off on one about how shit your life is. If you are going to do that, at least try and work through it in your posts, give yourself some written therapy - it'll help your readers too.

    Anyway, I've babbled too much. Thanks for this series of posts Kaelah. It's really refreshing to see this instead of "OMG DIY SELF HELP SMILE TODAY WOO!" (not that I don't love those too...*coughs*)


  6. I'm a bit older than you, so I didn't have the internet or a cell phone until my mid to late teenage years. It's crazy to me that teenagers NOW don't know a world without this stuff.

    I don't use much social networking other than playing around on Facebook and Instagram. I have a small blog but that's it, so my phone is used mainly for work-related reasons (and games, lol). The few days last summer I didn't have my phone were the best because I could go home from work and not deal with a constant barrage of texts and calls from my boss and my employees.

    As for topics I keep off limits (everywhere, including my personal facebook), I will not talk about the details of my current divorce proceedings(I've made vague references to it on my blog, but nothing more). I also will not talk about future relationships and I don't want to talk about the personal lives of my family/friends. Those are just a couple of the lines I've drawn for myself.

    Whew...sorry for the longest comment ever! Thanks for letting us share!

  7. Last year, I went for a full 30 days with no TV or internet and after the first couple of days, it was sheer bliss. I hate to say it since I'm also a blogger but it was true. It seems to me that all of the social media bombardment gives us this gnawing in the back of our minds that we've left something undone and should be checking something every minute of the day and that makes us less able to concentrate. Or to enjoy a moment like at that concert.

    My husband is a college professor and he says that it's interesting to see how if one of his students gets a text in the middle of class (and they're not allowed to check them), they start to visibly freak out and get the twitches and sweats.

  8. I Still find myself amazed when I'm sat at my laptop having checked blogger, replied to comments, done my formspring, twitter and all that business, scoured websites for pretty clothes and had a peek at my bank account - and suddenly I'm sat at my laptop or phone with nothing to do... like I don't have the entire internet - pretty much the full extent of human knowledge at my fingertips and I'm just sat on twitter waiting for something to pop up.

    ... I really need to find my way back to books... or other human beings.

  9. Loved this, Kaelahbee! (PS...My phone autocorrected your name with the "bee"..Haha!) I genuinely agree with you, every single word! Even though I chilled out for a hot minute with blogging, I'm right bak at Instagraming and FBing again! It's an obssessive! Though I don't share EVERY single thing in my life, I still do feel that I share quite a lot. I noticed this when people that I wasn't really close to at work would ask me about things and/or subjects that would really catch me off guard. That was a big realization...both good and bad things. Though we all understand the importance of living the moment in life, I also know that the connection to social networks and sharing our lives in such ways are now what it seems, a second nature characteristic. I'm guilty right there with you! So hypocrite or not, I enjoy it as much as you. Your indenting points were very well said. :)

    See ya later on Twitter or Instagram! Hehehe. :)

  10. I also feel quite addicted to my wee iPhone! Although I must say... I got rid of my Facebook account altogether about 2 years ago, and it was the best thing to do. I really think I hate that website, it causes more hassle than anything else!

    I do worry if I go maybe a week without blogging, but then I slap myself and realise barely anyone else will even notice! lol

    It's lovely having such readily available access to the internet at all times, but nothing beats being physically with the people you love most!

    Dayner x jewellery/fashion/lifestyle - mozzypop.com

  11. I definitely agree with everything you have said here. I often say that I 'wouldn't be able to live without my phone or laptop', it's even got to the point where when looking for villas to stay in on holiday in Cyprus, wifi was on my list of 'must haves'. Sad, I know. I have friends who never look at their phone and only have facebook (which is never checked) and they are doing just fine! I'm kind of glad we couldn't find the perfect villa in Cyprus with wifi, I'm quite looking forward to 2 weeks of peace and quiet. xx

  12. i think it's funny. i'm actually the opposite. i remember the 90's and going on"straight-edge chat rooms" meeting new people all over the country and "chatting" with people who sometimes lived right down the road. my parents had bought me a cell phone way back in the day and its so funny to see pictures of those old HUGE phones. i never used it- i was almost embarrassed to have it. i just basically kept it in my car in case i was about to be murdered or had a flat tire or something.

    i went a really long time without a cell phone after that. then just had silly cheap phones- no texting no internet etc. LAST weekend, yes I said last weekend. I have joined the rest of the human race and now have an iphone. it's kind of funny though. i'm sure as time goes on i'll figure it all out and use it more. but when people are asking me how i like it - or sending me texts and thinking its funny because i'm so slow at texting them back - i don't know what to really say. yeah it's cool what you can do on it. but do i really NEED all that, no. will i use all that it can do for me, probably not. i mean i do spend my fair share of time on my laptop reading blogs and shopping my way across the internet..but my favorite time of day - is pushing aside the computer and sitting there crocheting while watching a movie with my mister.. thats contentment for me..


  13. Wow,this is a great post,Kaelah. I just wrote a post about this same thing (mine's just a little less word-y though): http://charlottedickson.blogspot.com/2012/01/penny-for-your-thoughts.html & http://charlottedickson.blogspot.com/2012/01/penny-for-your-thoughts-part-2.html. I don't have an iPhone,but sometimes it really feels like information overload with keeping up with everything. My husband even says he doesn't want to use the computer anymore because he sees how much time I spend on it. I think having a break is nice and so worth it,in my opinion. Good luck!

  14. I used to be glued to my phone too. When I started dating my boyfriend, it drove him nuts. Eventually we made rules about phone usage that we both agreed upon. That doesn't mean I don't get on twitter or any other site often, but it's nice not to be on something all the time. Once I've graduate in May and found a job, I'm taking a weekend long technology vacation. It'll be fabulous

  15. I deleted facebook 6 months ago. Life has been grand. I can't remember being this free! My "friends" were people who I barely knew from high school and I swear they only wanted to keep tabs on me to laugh. Some were "friends" who were always too "busy" to hang out a few years later and some were family members with their own hillbilly dramaz. My facebook was full of pleasantries, not friends. I felt like I was a petri dish on there!
    Lately I've been feeling like I look at twitter just to see what others are doing when I'm bored. Most of the time I walk away without telling everyone what I was doing!
    It disturbs me how "connected" my boyfriend and I are to the net. Back before smart phones the lines at Disney buzzed with convo; I noticed yesterday they were pretty quiet because everyone was looking at a phone. I guess there really is nothing we can do (I love me some instagram!) except know when it isn't healthy and to draw boundaries.

  16. You just wrote EXACTLY what I've been thinking about for the past few days. If I don't have my kindle with me during lunch, I feel so naked. I wish it wasn't that way, but it's what I've grown accustomed to. This post inspired me maybe NOT bring it with me to lunch, and instead just people watch! People are so much more interesting than looking at a screen.

  17. In the summer time I live and work in a remote area of Alaska. No cell phones, internet, grocery stores, running water, or anything like that. I get 24 precious hours off each WEEK where I am able to use the internet, call family, write overdue blog posts, edit photos and do necessary day off tasks. I realize this extreme internet isolation isn't the solution for everyone but it does help me to think of my intentions before posting a blog and sharing every little moment with the world. However in the winter i live in Seattle and it is a completely different story! I agree with you, sometimes I am too busy figuring out how to mess with my camera or texting that I just don't enjoy my experience to the max. I have been trying not to do that because it feels like i'm creating the life I want people to see and not living in reality. All in all i agree with you and it is incredibly hard to find balance! I wish you luck!

  18. love the photo and the post too, enjoyed reading, thank you for posting this

  19. I know just what you mean. Late last year I went to see my favorite band *ever* live, and I was torn between "omgsh! They're playing my favorite song! I need a picture!" and "Omgsh! They're playing my favorite song! Put away the camera and just enjoy it, Katie!" I ended up compromising by getting just one pic and then putting my camera away and dancing like the was no tomorrow for the rest of the song. So glad I did. <3

  20. i find the whole connected thing really scary, i mean love the internet but i have made a promise to tom and for myself when i am hope i do not look at the computer, sometimes i do but i am not glued to it. when i am home i want to be with tom 100% when i am at work and it is slow then i can be on the computer while i am there and that is enough. i don't want to get a iphone for the very reason. some times it is really really nice to not have that temptation and be able to live and enjoy every second of life <3

  21. Im 17 and the only social networking site i take part in is facebook and blogger. and my facebook friends list is STRICTLY only people I know and like.
    no twitter, no flickr, no tumblr, no formspring, no google+ (although when everyone starts moving over to google+ and ignoring facebook, I'll probebly make the move too.)
    I used to have a phone when i was younger but for the better part of the last 2 years, I didn't even own a phone, I just recently got one and BARELY use it.
    Sometimes i feel un-connected, and sometimes i feel like im missing out, but at the end of the day, it is so stress free and and if i want to get in touch with my friends, ill call them and organise to do something.
    So i totally know what you're talking about, i think people are waaaaaaaaay to reliant on technology and social networking, we should cherish our privacy more and start enjoying our own life for what it is, instead of constantly having to relay it back to all your forums for other people to see and not care about.

  22. I have a friend who is an actress in LA. She was going to watch a taping of The Voice, and when they told her she couldn't take her phone inside, even on silent, she LEFT. She said it was because as an actress she couldn't be without it, but come on! That's what voicemail is for. She missed out on an awesome experience because she was so tied to her phone. I thought it was sad.

  23. Sometimes I think I live more of my life online than I do in the "real world". Whether it's at home on my laptop or on my phone, I'm almost constantly connected. Sometimes I think the only times I'm unplugged are when I'm in the shower or in a marathon book-reading session. I honestly can't even get through a meal without checking my phone at least once :/ I'm gonna start encouraging my friends to start playing the phone stacking game when we're out :)

  24. I don't have a smart phone, texting is about as fancy as it gets for me. And I don't have a keyboard, I push the numbers! haha
    Anyhow, my phone only costs $5/month and while I could upgade it, I work from home so there's no real point. If I want to do anything online, I have two computers to do it from. Three if I wanted to use my boyfriend's for some reason.
    Anyhow, since I work from home I find it VERY hard to disconnect sometimes. I think I'm on my computers a good 12 hours a day. I'm at my work computer for about 8 hours, and my personal laptop in the evenings (which is typically when I blog and surf the net).
    Disconnecting is amazing when I am able to do it! But disconnecting at home is really hard since I'm surrounded by computers. =\
    Oh, and Livejournal... Overshare overshare overshare. I think that back then we really did JOURNAL though, instead of blog, which is quite different. I think LiveJournal really was something more personal, and blogging, while still for ourselves, is also much more for others. I would never share the kinds of things or even think about writing them on my blog as I did my LiveJournal.
    Good god I posted some crazy shit back then. Of course, being on the internet as a teen is different from being on the internet as an adult. I care more about my private life now!
    Anyhow, speaking of disconnecting, I'm going to try and get off of here and enjoy my weekend now!

  25. I can so relate. A friend of mine just made a comment last night while we watched a movie. She said "Wow, you really never do let that thing leave your hands, do you?" I am just like you Kaelah, always in my hands, always misplacing it.

    It's funny because sometimes when I go away on mini trips or something, I will say okay, just gunna leave my cell, but then I am like "oh! I should tweet or blog this so my readers can see that sometimes I do have something exciting happen" hahaha

    I talk a lot about my personal life on my blog BUT I try to draw the limit about posting about my employment. I Could really get in trouble if I did that :D

  26. Even though I lived the first half of my life without the internet (but, oh, man, AOL IM was a great way to meet friends back in the mid to late '90s), and I have had a cell phone for less than 10 years, I do feel a tremendous amount of anxiety when I forget my phone at home or can't get on the internet. I have to remind myself that generations of people survived a 30 minute drive without having a phone just in case they have a flat tire, etc. I am not as connected as some people, and until my checkbook is a little more padded, I won't be. Now I have a phone that accesses the internet and takes pics, but I don't have one I can use instagram on. I think money/lack thereof/prioritization of money for things other than modern technology are the things that keep me from being with it and hip. As far as oversharing goes, I think people around my age and younger are used to seeing everyone's business shared, whether they are famous or not. The need/desire for privacy doesn't hit us in the same way it does my parents' generation.

    Alison :)

  27. with smartphones, cellphones, the internet television.... any technological medium, essentially, where you can be solitary and entertained, i have found that you miss out on.... well, the world and people around you. when you are attached to your smartphone, browsing facebook, reading about sally jo's undeserving oatmeal, you potentially miss out on an opportunity to start a conversation with a stranger, see an interesting store front, meet a new friend in person, read a book, write a poem, have coffee with an old friend, etc etc etc.

    connectedness through the internet and social media are incredible things. but, in no way do they replace veritable human contact, and visceral experiences.


  28. This year I'm making an effort not being so connected to my technology. I'm trying to limit on my time on sites like tumblr and pinterest because i was spending way too much time on that and not on other things such as reading a book or getting other aspects of my life up and running.

    I also had to get an address book for my purse because if I do leave my phone at home, I don't have any other numbers memorized besides my own, which is sad because growing up I had all the important phone numbers memorized. XD

    As for off-limit topics, I don't talk about work or relationships. I remember writing about how I was feeling during a tough time with my boyfriend at the time. I never mentioned his name or anything, but he knew that it about us. Doh. Maybe I shouldn't tell future boyfriends that I have a blog. Last month I found my LJ account and I was cringing when I was reading some of the stuff I wrote. They were pure drama. LOL.

  29. DUDE, get out of my head! (totally love the image, btw) My phone is either in my packet or my hand or the couch ate it. Happens all the time. I keep telling myself that I will take a vacation from social media, but have yet to do so. meh. I will. Soon. I swear...
    (new follower here and on twitter)


  30. I deleted Facebook last week. It wasn't too hard because I rarely use it but I felt it was the only way I felt "connected". When I deleted it, I emailed the friends I really wanted to see status updates on. It's been the best thing!

  31. I should clarify, it's been the best thing for me! I know everyone is different. If someone told me to delete Twitter, I couldn't do it!

  32. I've been feeling this exact way lately. I'm also attached to my iphone all the time, and my close friends call me the "insta-texter" because i respond so quickly. I've been trying really hard to get away from my phone - I leave it in my room when I go to the basement to watch a movie, I gave it to my step mom to put in her purse when we went out for dinner because I knew if it were in my pocket I'd check it constantly. AND IT FEELS SO GOOD! Weird, but I could definitely get used to it and I feel my ability to focus wholeheartedly on something will increase and I'm hoping that'll give me a better outlook and perception on life. We'll see :)

    Great post, great topic!

  33. Every Sunday my hubby and I turn our phones, computers, etc. off for a min of 4 hours. Just to have some family together time that doesn't get interrupted by tweets, emails, etc. Its a great system. You and mike should def. try it.

  34. I came to this exact same conclusion last year, where I was living just happened to have no wireless internet and no cell signal. It kinda bummed me out for a while but then I realised it was actually kind of nice that I could only use my laptop at my desk, that I wasn't constantly checking facebook to see what was going on and that I wasn't contactable 24/7.

    I read an article about this the other day - psychologists are calling it FOMO syndrome - fear of missing out! Crazy right!

    I love blogging, and I do spend a reasonable amount of time online, but I've made a real effort to keep my blog about my life, not my life about my blog!

  35. you may not believe me but...i went anti cell phone about 2 years ago and it's been the greatest experience of my life. my boyfriend doesnt have one either (he's been going about 3 years!) i'm 22 and he's 23 and we talk on AIM to each other. i love that though because it reminds me of younger days when cell phones weren't necessarily an option. i can easily afford a cell phone but it's like me being a vegetarian for so long...i can't imagine going back. i think they serve a purpose but i also think people sometimes abuse and become addicted to them (my 17 year old sister can't even hold a conversation cause shes constantly on her iphone). i realize now how much i was not really paying attention to because of being addicted to texting and talking on the phone. i learned new ways to occupy myself and i realized who actually cares enough to contact me as a friend without the convenience of a phone number. of course, i'm much more dependent on the internet but if i'm not home, it's not there! so my time is managed better.

    however, i'm kind of scared i may actually need to get a totally cool flip phone (or maybe one of those huge nokias if i can find one somewhere) because i start a brand new, full time real deal job soon in what i went to school for and i actually want them to be able to reach me easily. well, there's my ant technology (or anti cell phone rather) rant! people think we're both nuts for not having them but i love it :3

  36. i can relate! i have my phone with me wherever i go .. but when i'm on vacation, or somewhere where i know i can't go online or have reception, it doesn't bother me that much, actually!

    i just recently started blogging and am very conscious about oversharing. i've been on lj and don't want to get TO personal on my blog, posting about things and topics i might feel ashamed / embaressed about afterwards, haha!
    xo, cheyenne

  37. Ah, this hits home so hard. About six months ago my blackberry roller ball died and so I could only use the phone as, well...a phone. I got a new phone when my contract was up (an android this time) and have chosen NOT to put facebook, twitter or any other social network on the phone because I don't want it taking up my time. Once I learned to disconnect from my phone it felt so freeing. My boyfriend is constantly on his phone and it's so aggravating. When we go out, when we watch movies, he's always checking to see what's new. I agree, there needs to be some disconnect and how much will depend on the person. But I feel that so many people are missing out on so much just by not paying attention to it or only seeing it through their phones' lens. thanks for hitting on this.

  38. I can 100% relate to this. I am constantly on my phone/kindle/laptop updating my blog or tweeting or reading other's posts. I feel so naked without my phone, it's ridiculous. I do wonder how different things must've been before all of this technology kept us so connected, all the time.

    I've had to learn to cut back because my fiancé is not as into the whole digital world as I am, and so time with him, completely disconnected, has had to become an intentional priority for me. I love the net, but I love him more.

  39. Bahaha I love that! :)

    xoxo, Jjanga

  40. By the end of every week, I'm so tired from everything, I've begun putting my phone/the internet away for most of the weekend, tuning out the world & just spending time with my guy. It wasn't a planned thing... it just happened, I survived (was more relaxed) and kept doing it each weekend.

  41. I blogged about this recently, too - I took about a month off Facebook and found I didn't miss it; now that I'm back "on" it I find I don't have anything to say. That sounds like an odd thing for a blogger to say but I think there's a difference between actually writing 500 words on a subject you've put thought into (however personal) and firing off 160 angry digits about your boss; I don't actually object to social networking, I just think a lot of people I come across on those sites could do with a filter!

    I'm rambling now... I'll stop!

  42. I typically don't write anything on my blog that I wouldn't want my mother or a future employer to read. But that line is kind of wonky for different people.
    I've been avoiding getting a smart phone for exactly these reasons, I don't want to be constantly connected. But I would love to have a really nice camera connected to my phone. (I should probably just buy a little digital camera) I do tend to take the weekend 'off' from the internet. Or at least from the blog-o-sphere. It's good to have a couple days off and focus on more personal/physical things, otherwise I start to feel a little overwhelmed. Like looking at your 'stats' every day or your email every 30 minutes it can get kind of addicting... I like to cut myself some slack.

  43. You pointed out so many great things here. For e. I know personally what it feels like to be visiting with a friend or family member and I get shunned fo their phone. It makes me feel that I'm not worthy of their time when they are checking emails or texting others. I want to scream and say I'm right here in front of you! But I realize that everyone has the tendency to do this especially me! So when I'm with a loved one I ask myself if I'm making eye contact when we speak. I'd not chances are it's because I'm on my phone. So I put it down and focus on them.
    And as far as Instgram goes. I try to take a photo and then shove my phone in my purse for the rest of the event or wait to pull it out at the very end. The rest of the time, it's in the bottom of my purse so I wont touch it.
    I find these things really help me be in the moment but capture those little moments in a photo too!
    Thanks for sharing! I alway love this feature on your blog!

  44. I love the atmosphere of this blog, it's so fresh !!!

  45. i love that headboard...i want to make one so bad!!

  46. about a year ago i got really tired of this over sharing culture of ours, and i closed almost all of my social network sites. i bitterly kept facebook bacause if youre not in FB you miss things, like invites to places etc. that happened to me all the time when i wasn't on FB. i would be like hey why didn't you invite me to have dinner when you invited almost all of your other firends, like is something wrong? and the answer would be that i sent an invitation through FB and i'd be like i don't have a facebook! now i only have a blog and tumblr. tumblr's my guilty pleasure, even tho sometimes it seems such a wait of time, cause it's endless and i can't really process anything i see/read there. but i still really like it. and blogging's the best. i still do tho, spend way too much time online, and i feel like i'm always trying to cut it down, do 'real' stuff more.

    oh and i'm one of those people who don't photograph everything. it seems so odd to everybody since i love photography and i studied it for three years, but still like to experience things. when my friends take like 300-500 photos when they travel, i take around 60 and at gigs i almost never even take a camera with me. i just saw one of my favorite artists ever, Cat Power, and i took 2 photos! i thought that'd be enough of prove for me that i've seen her :D. but everybody does what feels best for them.

    Stu of Sometimes My Life is Like Bob Dylan's 115th Dream

  47. Kaelah, I totally loved this post! I just wanted to share my feelings too, because I can wayyyy relate. I think it's different for folks like you and I with the internet being such a HUGE part of our "professional" lives. I would love to be able to just delete a social media... or stop looking, but I can't. It's the way for fans to get in touch or perhaps someone will see my music on one of them and want to collaborate or book a show. The constant checking and updating feels more like an obligation... as with the instant feeling of the internet comes the impatience. No one's willing to wait. If an email is sent with an amazing opportunity, you better be there to reply and snatch it! Ah, someday when I'm a famous musician, I'll move to a cabin in the woods and have a management team to deal with all that stuff... they can send me possible opportunities by carrier pigeon. :D <3

  48. that is why i don't have an iphone. i'm already obsessed with the internet enough, and i know if i had one, i would be on it constantly. i have friends who are like that, can't even put their phone down for ONE HOUR to have a conversation/play a game/watch a movie! it drives me so crazy!

  49. i have a certain disconnect between how much i share on the internet and how much i WANT to share on the internet. i live in scotland and all of my friends are back in the states- so i think i update more frequently now than i did before because i feel like maybe people want to know what's going on with me. they don't, by the way. not really.

    i stopped blogging 2 months ago because i felt like i had nothing to say. it wasn't official. i just...forgot about it because my life is so boring right now. but when i was blogging regularly, i had loads of off-limit topics. mostly my family problems, anything that happens in the bedroom or the bathroom, and my husband's personal life.

    also, my name is lauren, and i am a tumblr addict.

  50. I've learned to not answer texts or notifications right away also helps. it might seem a little much, but if you just put it in your purse on silent, and don't look at your phone the whole time you're driving to the (lets say..) grocery store while you're grocery store shopping, and on your way home. Ive been loving it.
    Maybe I'll look at my phone to check the time between then, but being able to just put it back in your purse (even if you had a IG comment, and a friend text you) really feels good.

  51. I went to the City and Colour concert in Calgary recently and Dallas also asked the crowd to put their phones away for one song. There were sooo many people that had their phones out not even half-way through the song. It actually made me kind of angry. To me it felt disrespectful to the artist. Kind of like when you are out with a friend or on a date and the other person is on their phone the whole time.

    I rebelled against texting, Facebook and twitter for the longest time, but finally caved one by one and now I'm finding it pretty hard to stay away from my phone. I'm pretty much addicted to instagram.

    Things that I've done that help me control the urge to be on my phone all the time is to have all push notifications turned off and I rarely answer my phone when I'm with someone else. The one problem I've encountered is that friends and family are always complaining that I'm too hard to reach.

    xo Ashley


HEY! Thanks for dropping by. xo KB